The Power of Words

Hate: to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; detest

Are humans stupid to love, hope, and dream?  Are we stupid to live?  Hate surrounds us all, it’s unfair and blind.  Are we blind as to its own existence?  I didn’t know that I could hate until this year.  I learned that grudges, when not treated at their start always spawns into hate, and that sometimes, you even forget why you hate someone. 

Today, on my Facebook, I had a few hate messages.  I’m thinking of quitting Facebook for good.  It just isn’t fair that I get hate messages.  Why do people hate me?  Why am I invisible?  My best friend gave me a look of hatred because I might move and I was completely ignored today.  I just love school. 

I just cannot fathom how some people can be so cruel to others, how do they live with themselves?  How can you live with the fact that you are hurting other people.  How do you love if you are living a life of hate?  I wouldn’t be able to do that, but I guess some people are so cold that they have no problem hating others.

I wish I could just fly away to where I am loved, if there exists such a place.  If I could go back two days to where I was lying in the snow, staring at the clouds, with family and friends by my side, I wouldn’t be crying right now.  I guess I’ve figured what hate means.  And it means emptiness.

I’m feeling empty.


5 Comments so far
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thanks for your comment on my poem 🙂 I went through the same thing you are, and came out the other side with my sanity intact. There will always be people determined to undermine your confidence, but the trick is not to let them. It’s bloody hard, but you’ll be the better for it when you come out of the other side. One phrase that got me through was ‘don’t let the bastards grind you down’ 🙂

Comment by tattymuff

In the fifth grade, I attended a new school with my best friend, hoping so much I’d love the school and everyone would like me. They acted nice in the beginning but eventually no one talked to me-including my best friend. She hung out with the girls who were causing me the most pain. It was the worst year of my life. They didn’t even have enough courage to bully me in person, they just did it online. A few days before graduation, our class was watching a video. Everyone was talking, but me (the film was very good). I heard giggling behind me and knew that the mean girls (including my best friend) were sitting there. Later on, I had learned (from my best friend) that they had stuck dried gum in my hair (which later fell out). I was so angry but then I remembered a distinctive laugh in my head-my best friend. I quickly realized that “my best friend” had been the instigator all along-pushing me to reply angrily to the mean messages the girls had been sending me and probably egging them on too. I was so angry. But I just wanted to get the heck out of that school so stuck out the rest of the days. Turns out, though, that my teacher had found out about the whole cyber-bullying issue. She notified administration. My graduating class was practiciing for our graduation when I was called to go to the office, as well as one of the other mean girls. We both recieved ISS. To this day I have no clue as to why I recieved ISS. I was the victim. I has spent an entire year crying everyday, wishing I would have more than one friend, wishing, wishing, wishing. I was the one who spent the next year without confidence and extremely low self-esteem. I ate lunch with no one and read a book. Yet, I was the one in trouble. Someday, I will sue the school system. I now talk to the new kid and the quiet kid because I know what it was like to be one. I am NEVER mean to anyone because you NEVER know what can be going on in their lives. In a few years, Em, you’ll be out of this and happier than you’ve ever been in your life. Just wait and see!

Comment by lovelyvera

Oh. My. God. I’m so sorry Paige! I now see why you relate to me and why you were pissed about the emails. You didn’t deserve to get in trouble. This reminds me of a film I saw on LifeTime (Yes, I watch LifeTime movies) about bullying. The victim ended up attempting suicide, and even then the girls didn’t stop. I bawled during that movie and I NEVER cry.

Paige, I will never let that happen to you, if anyone tries to do that to you, I’d beat their sorry ass apart. And I will always be there, so don’t worry, you’ll always have a friend.

Did I ever tell you about 7th grade? It was a tough year for me, being the new girl and all.

On the first day of school, someone came up to me and said “I hate you.” I didn’t know that girl. I was shocked, I thought that only happened in movies. The year continued, I was laughed at by some of the popular girls: I wasn’t pretty, I was stupid, I was socially retarded. The words hurt so much. Although nothing compared to 8th grade, the worst still had yet to come.

I made a litte group of friends, 3 or 4 and one girl just got mad at me. One day, I arrived at school and no one would talk to me, I was invisible. If I said “What the heck, what’s wrong?” I’d just hear “Go check your email.”

Well, I did check it in 4th period (Eastern Hemisphere Geography) and I almost fainted when I read the email. Everything wrong about me, every thing I did was twisted out of proportion. I wanted to die.

8th grade, well, you know the story.

And 9th grade, I told you about an hour ago…

I just love school! 😛

Comment by lostinanobscure

Thank you Emilie, I can’t believe I’ve never told you about that. It still brings tears to my eyes. Bullying can leave really deep scars. I bet the girls don’t remember what they did to me, but I sure remember what they did and I always will. The same with you. That’s why I always told you that you’ll get through this because I did and know that you can. And you will always be my friend too, Emilie 🙂

Comment by lovelyvera

Bullying does live deep scars, like the ones on me, they will never go away. There is no cover up to remove these scars, and there is no true way to forget. But never forget, Paige. With this, you can make future generations even better. I will never forget my experiences. It is impossible, and in a sense I am glad because I am stronger. Paige, you are one of my strongest friends and that is something that I admire. Everyday, I keep thinking: Why can’t Paige be here?

I did get through last year, and now there is a new this year (Jake…) and I can get through this. I know I can.


Comment by lostinanobscure

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